In 2023 I stumbled upon the song Baggersee by a band called The Butcher Sisters. It was a weird German metal song about drinking beer at a lake and ended with the question of who had pissed in the water. It’s one of those songs you want to hate because it’s so painfully stupid but simply can’t because of the same reason. To be frank, I enjoyed it so much more than I wanted to admit. TBS have slowly but surely infested my playlist with their music ever since. Three years, and several TBS songs later, I may still haven't figured out who pissed in the water, but there is one thing I know for sure: the future of German metal has arrived, and it’s here to test your limits.
Their newest concoction was released in January, titled Das Schwarze Album (eng.: The Black Album). But don’t let the title fool you, this album is a wild ride from start to finish that you wouldn’t believe existed if you had never listened to it. The band’s singer and shouter Stroppo summed up the album experience spot on in an interview: "This album splits people – with an axe."
So, let's address the axe in the room: the album is genre-bending and silly, refusing any categorization. Despite being an avid TBS listener for a few years now, I still cannot and probably will never be able to properly describe their music style. Their signature sound is a mixture of metal and rap, with a hint of every other genre in existence, topped off with blunt and silly lyrics. And exactly this refusal of sticking to rules and conventions is what makes people either love or hate Das Schwarze Album.
The album opens with Piep Piep Piep, a satirical metal-hardstyle track about our mainstream social media use. The lyrics are blunt, exaggerated and throw the mirror directly at your face: "Just one more meme, I fuck my life / I don't need advice, I need screentime / I want hemorrhoids from on-toilet-swiping". It may be stupid, it may be extreme, but it’s relatable. Don't deny it. Everyone of us has taken their phone to the bathroom before or has spent too much time scrolling on social media despite knowing that you have important things to do. The lyrics are ugly and provocative, and self-aware as the band uses memes and other references to social media culture in their promotions, music videos and live shows, like rickrolling their fans during concerts or using purposefully badly edited videos for promoting their music.
As you can already see pop culture, but especially German and metal pop culture, plays a huge role in Das Schwarze Album. It is riddled with pop culture references, both lyrically and musically and plays with nostalgia. Cityroller is nostalgia for the late 90s and early 2000s in the form of a song. The sound has a retro vibe, and the lyrics are all about riding your scooter with friends and wondering how much the fish is. (Yes, this is a Scooter reference.) The guttural vocals represent the universal experience of being hit in the shin with said scooter: “AAH my shin.” You cannot tell me that metal isn’t relatable. Scheiss für mich is reminiscent of 2000s pop punk describing the experience of your dog taking way too long to take a poop.
White Monster is arguably the most popular song by the band. Even a year later I still wonder how this song didn’t go viral. It’s got everything: a catchy EDM chorus that is heavily inspired by the 2000s nightcore era, groovy riffs and lyrics poking fun at the critical voices towards energy drink consumption. I may not be addicted to caffein (I promise), but I love White Monster and have to endure the annoying discussions about energy drinks being bad for you, which all energy drinkers are aware of. This self-awareness is also prominent in the song, delivering provocative lyrics and setting the statement that “Without taurine and caffein life doesn’t make sense”, which is also seriously one of the most beautiful melodies to ever grace my ears.
The masterpiece is followed by another “I-don’t-care” song: Detlef D Soost. Yes, it’s about the German dancer and choreographer. In this hip-hop-inspired dance track he is praised for simply wanting to do what he loves: dancing.
Right in the middle of the album sits Bierosaufus Ex, which I personally would consider to be the band's Opus Magnum. (No, the music has not wrecked my brain yet. This is the actual correct Latin term.) And yes, you guessed it: It’s a song about a beer-drinking dinosaur. It takes all of TBS‘s gimmicks and multiplies them by one hundred. Even I, as an avid fan of the band, was completely astonished the first time I listened to this song. The first minute seems like a typical TBS song, until Lorna Shore's iconic animalistic vocal breakdown in To The Hellfire is suddenly turned into the audible alcohol-excess of a beer-drinking dinosaur, immediately followed by a parody of Kollegah's doubletime rap in Für Immer. Every time I thought it couldn't get any crazier, it did. It is one of those songs that are so stupidly absurd that you cannot not love it. Though this song does not only push the band's absurdity to a new extreme, it also shows that they are in fact masters of their art. While it may often not seem like it, they know exactly what they are doing.
The album continues with Ü30, an almost depressing song about everything in life goes downhill after turning 30. All the struggles and pain of living through your third decade of life are represented by devastating crying in autotune. It really makes you excited to finally turn 30. It is followed by a whiplash-like transition into the upbeat Great Music Band. A ‘Denglisch’ party song about “living the Rockstern-Lebensstil”, named after their self-given band-title. Herr Dokter is a summer tune about Germans’ habit of getting a sick note when they would rather enjoy their day instead of working. Aptly, the hook “I can never get enough of working time fraud.” is just as alluring as ‘Arbeitszeitbetrug’ itself. Lachen is completely made up of German wordplay jokes that are impossible to translate into English: “I’ve called Spiderman, but he didn’t have (inter)net, that son of a whore.” Yes, the insults are absolutely necessary and obviously provide the lyrics with extra depth. Wacken is an anthem-like homage to Germany’s biggest metal festival of the same name and in Klettergerüst TBS turn kindergarten rhymes into an emotional country ballad.
I know this is a lot to process. You probably feel like me after listening to the album for the first time. Every time the next song started, I was caught by surprise, as I could’ve never guessed what I should expect next. But you are prepared now, at least to an extent. Though, one thing you won’t be prepared for is how musically qualitative the album actually is. Take it as a reminder that funny and humorous music does NOT equal bad quality music. This conflict between qualitative music and, seemingly, low-quality lyrics, is what’s either so provocative and/or exciting about this album. Whether it may be true or not, TBS deny any possible meanings attached to their songs, refusing any predictability or rule set. (Don't even bother looking up interviews, you will leave with even more questions.) Exactly with this unpredictability and meaninglessness does Das Schwarze Album break molds and push boundaries by escaping expectations. This lack of meaning is the exact axe that splits people into either loving or hating this album. But with no rule set, you can make your own rules, which includes creating your own meaning. This is why I believe that in today’s age, where art is expected and forced to be meaningful and productive, simply having fun with making art is the highest form of rebellion.
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